Day 7: "With an Open Palm"

This morning's SRF service, was about giving love. The speaker made an interesting analogy. He said that when your prayers and meditations are focused on looking for an answer, it is like you are clenching your fist with the intent of receiving. However, if you give with an open palm–give and think of love in your prayers and meditations–it is much easier to receive. In simple terms, you cannot receive what you truly need with a closed fist. I spent some time meditating upon this idea and thought about how it is relevant to me. In meditation, I came up with this poem and thought I'd share it with you as a part of my blog for the day. It's just something small and still a work in progress, I love feedback if you have any.

"With an Open Palm"

With a clenched fist, I took a piece of you 

From the day we parted. 

It was just a little piece, so you never knew.

Eye squinched,

Face pinched,

And clenched fist to my little heart,

Too afraid that letting that part

Of you go would mean forgetting.

Forever loosing,

The love I once felt with such happiness.

Without a chance to ever confess 

That you have been my reason to live– 

My reason to give

Life a chance and wanting nothing more than to

Dance with you in my arms–Time finally on our side. 

So I held that piece 

Of you 

Like sand in my fist, you kept slipping through

My fingers. And my clenched fist

Had no bearing on the day when I just missed

You, by a moment.

And so tonight, my love, I release–

With an open palm,

I send all my love to you.

With the only hope that someday, 

You just might see me, and love me too.

And the Waves Just Keep Crashing Down onto the Beach

Top: Forever 21, Sweatpants: Pink Zone, DIY decorated knock-off Toms (not photographed): Rite Aid

I hope you enjoyed that brief interlude. Aside from this little glimmer of inspiration, my day was quite uneventful and boring. I spent the entire day doing physics and I'm still knee-deep in homework. Tomorrow marks the first day of "Insanity" workout hell-month (AKA Month Two). And yes, that was month, not week–month.

My DIY knock-off decorated Toms that I made with acrylic paint.

They feature an "ohm" symbol and a lotus flower.

Today's photo sums up what I feel Sunday should be like. Although most of the time it is get-your-shit-together-day. But regardless, Sunday to me is the day that is the most refreshing. After service in the morning, I always leave feeling peaceful, relaxed, and with a sense that I can conquer the coming week just fine. And before settling for a long day of numbers and optics with my main physics buddy, I stopped by Del Mar to pick up a sandwich from Board and Brew and to look at the ocean. Just seeing the ocean, hearing the waves, watching surfers bob up and down over the swells, brings me this serene feeling that is missing so often in my life. It makes me feel safe. And so I took my picture of the day there–on one of the cliffs above the shoreline, just a little south of 15th Street. I was wearing what I consider a perfect Sunday outfit. It was comfortable and refreshing. I wore one of my favorite tops–a beautiful, flowing lace piece that I got at the Forever 21 in New York las spring, my favorite grey, tie-dye sweatpants, and DIY decorated knock-off Toms. Not much too it but, but it really captured the essence of what I think Sunday should be. The photo is Sunday. It is what I want my Sundays to be in the future–my peace days. The days of renewing, creating, and learning.